Oops, I Did It Again!

I woke up with two thoughts in my head this morning. One, "Are you serious? I really have to get up right now!" And Two, "Ok, so even though I feel terrible I'm going to put on a smile and get through this day as the best mother I can be." Well, I did it again...I failed. Instead of greeting the day with a smile, I greeted it with a very bad attitude. This is the second night in a row of virtually no sleep, and the third day in a row of feeling pretty terrible physically. I have a sick husband and a three year old who has decided to start waking up every hour for no apparent reason. I made a trip to the pharmacy at 1:30 this morning and when I got back, took care of Josh, and started to drift off to sleep, the crying began again. (And I'm not just talking about Sarah. Lol!)

I can't believe I went through this for over two years with Hailey! It's only been a couple months since she's been sleeping through the night, but it feels like forever when your body is finally getting the sleep that it has so desperately needed. If I felt like this for two years, and managed to still function, then surely I can make it through a few days of this, right? Surely it can't be THAT hard to put on a smile and greet my kids lovingly and full of understanding with every whine and every tattle. I guess I've got some more growing up to do myself.

We like to throw tantrums, don't we. We like to give ourselves excuses for our attitude issues. It makes us feel better to justify our actions with, "Look what's been done to me! Did you hear what they just said? Did you see what they JUST did?! I have every right to feel this way!" On and on we go with the excuses. Yet, that's exactly what they are...excuses. The truth is, we have the ultimate choice, no matter what our situation, to have a good attitude. This morning, I made the wrong choice...again.

I get so frustrated at myself when I do that. I wake up with the best intentions, only for them to be shot down...sometimes by me, sometimes by the enemy, sometimes by just plain life events. At our Women's Conference last month, one of the speakers was talking about our "aromas." I'm not talking about bodily odors here, I'm talking about our "spiritual" aromas. She said this, "You may wake up with a God aroma and a God fragrance, but as soon as your feet hit the floor, a new aroma can try to be put on you. If you choose to wear the wrong aroma, it will spread to others. We need to reject the wrong aromas we don't want so that we are only spreading the aroma of God."

How true that is! The trick is to recognize the bad aroma before it's too late to get it off. She also used the example of when you're walking through a department store and the ladies/gentlemen are all lined up to spray you with the latest fragrances, in the hopes that you will love the aroma so much that you will run back to the counter and purchase "their" fragrance. Usually they are gracious and ask you before they spray you but sometimes, you get that one over-zealous sprayer who just decides to squirt you anyway. Then, for the rest of the day, you're stuck with an aroma that you most likely would have never chosen for yourself and yet, you're spreading it around everywhere you go!

It's the same way with our spiritual aromas. We have to be on guard and ready to dodge the bad aromas as soon as we see them coming. If we happen to get sprayed, we need to take a shower in the cleansing water of Jesus and get it off immediately. Wash yourself with the Word of God and move on. Don't let the aroma stay on you for the entire day. You never know the opportunities that could be missed for you to be a blessing to someone else. And that includes your spouse and your children. We have to "put on love" every day, sometimes several times a day. That requires an action on our part. It requires us choosing that we're going to do it, and then following through and doing it. Easier said then done, I know. But, I'm going to try my best today and every day to make the choice to put on the aroma of Jesus, as hard as it may be.