Pursuing Peace

I don't know if you're like me, but I am not a huge fan of "change."  I like life to be exciting and fun, but I also crave stability.  I don't like it when things are unsettled.  Every now and then I'll get a feeling that something, some kind of change, is around the corner.  For a brief moment, I'll feel a twinge of excitement.  In the next moment, I get an uneasy feeling that comes over me.  I really hate that because I'd rather just be excited.  The thing is, I have no idea what I'm excited or uneasy about!  It's just a "feeling" that a change is coming.  I've had this feeling for a couple of days now and I really wish it would go away. 

I've had some big changes happen in my life.  I've gotten through every one of them with the Lord's help, so I have no doubt that if a change really is coming He'll be with me through it.  I think the worst part is not knowing what the change is.  It could very well be a positive change...but there's no way to tell the future.  In these times when I have this feeling, I have to really guard myself against anxiety.  Anxiety creeps in so easily and it can wreak havoc in your life.  I cling to the verse that says, "The Lord is near. ⁶Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~ Philippians 4:5b-7

I need the peace of God that transcends all understanding, especially in these times of uncertainty about the future.  At our women's service at church yesterday, the speaker talked about "The Pursuit of Peace."  I found it really interesting when she said that we have to pursue peace.  It's really true.  We can't expect peace to just fall into our lap and make us feel all warm and fuzzy.  Now, there have been times where I've been having a tough day and all of a sudden a peace has come over me that I didn't understand, but I was glad it was there.  It usually ends up that someone will tell me later that they were praying for me that day.  But, in the times where you feel like your heart and mind are in turmoil, you have to go after peace.  Sometimes you have to chase it down in an active effort to find it.  And sometimes, when you do find it, it's not exactly a warm fuzzy kind of feeling that you get.  It's a "knowing" deep in your heart, your gut, that everything is going to be OK.  It settles you even though on the surface you may still "feel" unsettled.  That kind of peace comes from praying, reading the Word, talking with other godly people who are speaking life into your situation, etc.

I have no idea what this particular feeling that I'm having now is going to turn out to be but I know my God is with me no matter what, good or bad.  I know this because he's never failed me and I know he loves me.  What do you do to find peace?  Where do you go?  I know for me, sometimes it seems near impossible!  With my two girls, my husband, the jets constantly flying over my house, etc., etc., there isn't really much peace unless I put ear plugs in and climb under the covers.  Even then, my thoughts are there, and when I sleep, my dreams are there.  I wonder why we equate peace with silence?

I used to try to find peace by taking a walk along the waterfront, having a cup of tea, going for a long drive, etc. It always worked to calm me down, but only temporarily.  I was basically trying to run away from the feeling of unsettledness, but as my pastor likes to say, "Wherever you go, there you are!"  The only way to find true peace is not to run away from the bad feelings, but to run to the Lord.  You may not have peace the very first time you pray.  Sometimes you have to pray for a few days, or even weeks!  But, God promises us that if we seek Him, we will find him.  When we find Him, we find peace.

I will keep you posted as to what this "feeling" turns out to be.  It might be nothing at all.  Usually though, when the feeling is this strong and won't go away, I can pretty much bet on something happening.  I'm believing for good things!  Until I know, I'll be camping out with my Bible and a cup of tea.  (Tea really does help.)